Medical Malpractice

Could Rush possibly be responsible for the swine flu epidemic?

PLEASE NOTE THIS IS SATIRE- Satire by R J Shulman New York -- (PTSD News) -- The World Health Organization has called it a “public health emergency of international concern." The swine flu virus has already infected millions in the United States, sparking worldwide alarm. The Center for Disease Control in Atlanta announced on Tuesday that they have traced the origin of the flu to talk show host Rush Limbaugh. “This is extremely troubling,” said Sarah Tinsdale of the CDC, “as Limbaugh has contact with millions of Americans every day.” Doctors say the symptoms of swine flu are getting hot under the collar with fever, the sudden inability to think for yourself, lack of appetite for the truth and diarrhea of the mouth. “One minute I started sneezing,” said Roger Wombat of Hickory, North Carolina, “and the next minute I said I wanted President Obama to fail.” “It was the swine flu that made me do it,” said Joseph Wynsocki of Lima, Ohio. “The fever took over my brain and I started to dismantle a Habitat for Humanity house that was slated for a welfare mother, brick by brick.” Apparently, the swine flu epidemic was the cause of thousands of infected sufferers joining together in “tea parties” to protest Obama’s tax reduction, claiming it made them pay too much in taxes. “I temporarily lost the use of my brain,” said Wanda Flemming of New Rochelle, New York, who is recovering in a White Plains hospital. “I had the radio tuned to Rush and all of a sudden I started vomiting out hatred toward poor people,” said Charlie Joe Briggs of Everett, Washington. “And I’ve been puking out garbage ever since.” Doctors at Seattle General Hospital have listed Briggs in guarded condition. Researchers say the best way to avoid getting swine flu is whenever you hear the sound of Limbaugh or one of his “dittoheads” is to pull a mask over your ears. Scientists are concerned over the rapid spread of the flu. “If this disease keeps infecting people at this rate,” said Dr. Lester Philpot of the CDC, “America will change from a country of decent human beings to a nation of swine.” 28 April 2009 Steve M-you should post this on your own dime (-10 points)

Public Comments

1. Yep...The fatal fart.
2. Don't think so. Two points please.
3. And all this time I thought it was from Bush.
4. That's funny! But I was told that the swine flu was created by Democrats so that the people would totally be dependent on Pres.Obama to fulfill all there needs!
5. LOL probably he already is a swine.
6. YaaaaWWWWNNNN
7. Are you sure it's satire !!!!!
8. OH MY GOD WE GOTTA TELL SOMEBODY
9. I think Paris Hilton did it. That b*tch.
10. Well, he IS a pig . . . . But there's a critical difference: there's a cure for swine flu.
11. No but Al gore's company is ready to cash in. LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - The swine flu outbreak is likely to benefit one of the most prolific and successful venture capital firms in the United States: Kleiner Perkins Caufield & Byers, Thomson Reuters Private Equity Week reported on Friday. Shares of the two public companies in the firm’s portfolio of eight Pandemic and Bio Defense companies — BioCryst Pharmaceuticals and Novavax — jumped Friday on news that the swine flu killed a reported 60 people in Mexico and has infected people in the United States. The World Health Organization (WHO) said the virus appears to be susceptible to Roche’s flu drug Tamiflu, also known as oseltamivir, but not to older flu drugs such as amantadine. http://nwoobserver.wordpress.com/2009/04/25/venture-capital-firm-set-to-reap-rewards-on-swine-flu/
12. Since B.O. is becoming a tyrant and a socialist.The swine flu from the ultimate pig.We got it from "The Man"
13. It was engineered in a laboratory as part of the Jesuit-New World Order plan for human depopulation, and is nothing to laugh about.
14. Could Obama possibly be responsible for the swine flu epidemic? PLEASE NOTE THIS IS SATIRE- Satire by R J Shulman New York -- (PTSD News) -- The World Health Organization has called it a “public health emergency of international concern." The swine flu virus has already infected millions in the United States, sparking worldwide alarm. The Center for Disease Control in Atlanta announced on Tuesday that they have traced the origin of the flu to President Barack Obama. “This is extremely troubling,” said Sarah Tinsdale of the CDC, “as Obama has contact with millions of Americans every day.” Doctors say the symptoms of swine flu are getting hot under the collar with fever, the sudden inability to think for yourself, lack of appetite for the truth and diarrhea of the mouth. “One minute I started sneezing,” said Roger Wombat of Hickory, North Carolina, “and the next minute I said I wanted to shoot some pirates.” “It was the swine flu that made me do it,” said Joseph Wynsocki of Lima, Ohio. “The fever took over my brain and I started to bow and chant "My Messiah" every time I saw a picture of president Obama." Apparently, the swine flu epidemic was the cause of thousands of infected sufferers joining together in “war protests” to protest Obama’s sending even more troops to Afganistan, claiming it made them pay too much attention to the world around them. “I temporarily lost the use of my brain,” said Wanda Flemming of New Rochelle, New York, who is recovering in a White Plains hospital. “I had the radio tuned to Rush and all of a sudden I started realizing what a socialist agenda Obama has for the country,” said Charlie Joe Briggs of Everett, Washington. “And I’ve been puking out garbage ever since.” Doctors at Seattle General Hospital have listed Briggs in guarded condition. Researchers say the best way to avoid getting swine flu is whenever you hear the sound of Obama or one of his “Worshipers” is to pull a mask over your ears. Scientists are concerned over the rapid spread of the flu. “If this disease keeps infecting people at this rate,” said Dr. Lester Philpot of the CDC, “America will change from a country of decent human beings to a nation of socialist swines.” 28 April 2009